Sunday, May 25, 2008

Intermission 2 休止 その2

Okay, I still can't find enough time and the right mood to finish the next post about the trip. So in the interest of keeping you.. *ahem* interested, I will post something I wrote in Japanese last February.

You can say that this is my very first Japanese piece, or half-piece, because it is not complete. Basically, during this year's speech contest preparation, we were given a homework to write a speech based on the "If" theme of last year's contest. I only completed half of the homework and here it is (after many corrections):

もし空っぽの部屋で起きたら・・・

私たち人間は生活に必要なものを得るために苦労するものです。
そして順調になっていくと、すぐに快楽を追い求めるようになっています。
仕事が終わって、友達に会って遊んだり興味深い本を読んだり映画を見たりしています。
私たちはいつも現在の活動が終わったあと、次の活動を始めるようにしています。
眠くなるまでこうして、そして、眠ります。
次の日に早く起きて仕事場へ行って働きます。そして
・・ 繰り返します。

それは日常生活ということです。
あまり
、じっくり考える時間がないように見えます。

ところが、もしすべての当たり前だと思っていることが消えたら、もし行きたいところへ行けなくて会いたい人に会えなかったら、どうなりますか。
もし次の日に、ドアも窓もないまったく空っぽの部屋で起きたら、どうしますか。

少し、目を閉じて想像して見ましょう・・

知らない場所で目がさめて、すぐに迷います。ここはいったいどこかと自分に聞きます。
時間を調べるように窓や時計を探して見回しますが、壁や床しか見えません。
ドアさえありません。

誰かが近くにいるかどうか調べるために声を出しますが、返事がまったくありません。動きがぜんぜん聞こえません。

いったい何が起こっているのか
僕はなぜここにいるのか

また、みんながどこにいるのか。

様子を考えば考えるほど、答えが分からない質問がどんどん増えてくるのです。

どんな気持ちになりますか。迷い?恐怖? それとも、どんなに面白い事情か分かって微笑みますか。

僕は頭が可笑しくなる間際ですか。

そして、どうしますか。周りに本やテレビなど時間をすごしやすくするものがないので、一瞬はまるで永遠のように見えます。どうするか考えて最後に分かりした。考えるしか何もできません。
心しか、遊び場がないと言うことになりました。

つづく・・

That's it. When I submitted it, I got encouraging feedback from the senseis. So, I felt "hmm, I should complete it". But then I thought "If I complete it, I might break it" (assuming it is not broken already). "Better to have a good half than to have a broken whole" I thought. I still would like to complete it though, but this kind of writing can't be planned for; it depends on the whim (気まぐれ). Maybe someday I will sit down and write the other half.

So? What do you think? I would like to hear your honest opinions, so I was thinking of disabling comments and inviting you to send your comments by e-mail. But last time I did that nobody sent any comments, so I will never underestimate your laziness again.

9 comments:

ukyou said...

Samer san!
An excellent piece!
I love every bit of it!
you should seriously consider taking it to the next level

た!

Saemon 左衛門 said...

Thank you sensei, you made my weekend.

It's also been a while since you commented here, so I thought you were boycotting my blog or something :p

Anonymous said...

まるでクワイエットルーム(精神科病棟の隔離部屋)での話みたいですね。何も無い真っ白な部屋は錯乱している人を落ち着かせたり、精神疾患を治療するのにはいいかもしれませんが、恐らく普通の健康的な人が入ったら三日もしないうちにボケてくると思います。一人で考えるにしろ、やっぱり脳に刺激は必要です。
今ヨルダンで、このような閉塞感を感じながら生きているのでしょうか…?

Anonymous said...

そして、「考える」ことって、訓練されていないと意外と難しい。なぜなら「考える」=「思考する」ことって、理性だから。
心が追い詰められた状況になると、本当に強くなければ「思考」は「妄想」に負けちゃう。

…サエモンさんらしいポストでした。2年前のスピーチコンテストの準備で、二人でよくディスカッションしたことも思い出しました。

K-s

Saemon 左衛門 said...

Gengoro-san,
It took me quite some time understanding your comment because the language is way above my level (notice that my piece is made up of simple words), so allow me to answer in English .

You (and K-s) are correct about the possible outcomes you describe, but I think you, specifically, miss the point, by no fault of yours.

First, while having things around stimulate thinking, they do so in a very guided and material way, so if you see a car, you'll think about how cool it looks, how useful it is or how it works, but not much else. So having objects stimulate thinking is like 'thinking on rails'.

Second, regarding your question, it shows that you are thinking of confinement and closure, BUT I was thinking about being stripped or abstracted from everyday things, especially the things that provide us with a sense of engagement and sensory delight and being freed to think about the supposedly important stuff. The way you understood it is similar to torture, but the way I do it's similar to being liberated.

To answer your question: No I don't feel closure living in Jordan, and actually its the exact opposite of that. This idea was borne from my experiences going to foreign countries and from meeting foreigners.

My idea is indeed similar to confinement rooms in psychiatries but this was not intentional and was not my inspiration at all. I think the problem was that it is not complete, but also this was a good thing because I could read your reactions (とらえかた).

If I completed the piece, you would see that a major theme is thinking about our haves and have nots, and how fortunate we are and to also appreciate things we didn't notice around us before.

This is a similar exercise to fasting in Ramadan. Not eating or drinking until sunset, we genuinely feel how it is to be poor and without food and we really start to feel gratitude, and also care for the poor. So you can think of it as an extention of this.

Reading your and K-s' feedback, I think the essay needs revision. All in all, valuable feedback, so thank you very much.

K先生、
そうですね。もっと優しくしたほうがいいですね。
スピーチの準備の時、先生とのディスカッションを絶対忘れませんよ。とても面白くて、ときどき感動でいっぱいディスカッションでした。

ご意見を聞かせてありがとう(正しい日本語かな)

では、長いコメントをすみません。
Sorry for the long comment!

momiji said...

nice half speech, looking forward for the other half.
sometimes we think about the things that liberate us as a prison.
In my opinion, to be in such a room is better than being jailed by our desires and notions.
Thanks for the post, we should think about things in different way from while to while.

Saemon 左衛門 said...

Thank you, Momiji-san. I'm glad you liked it.

まもなくーいや、もうすぐ旅行に関する巨大ポストです。

Amani AbuQdais أماني أبوقديس said...

I enjoyed reading every word of it :)
People can barely write such things in their own language so writing this in Japanese is just GREAT!

Saemon 左衛門 said...

Thanks Amani-san.
Many times I feel I want to express myself in Japanese, but it takes lots of time and non-Japanese speakers can't read it.

When I write in Japanese some sentences feel 'Englishy' and native senseis really don't like to see this (mezawari toiu yatsu), but when I write in English I end up with 'Japanesey' English.

ya3ni mush khalseen..